My day…
Starts with joy .. the sun streaming in from my bedroom windows as I prepare for the day
My husband get’s up EARLY to work in his office before he heads out .. I meet him in the kitchen as we both are after coffee (morning elixir) .. we talk shop .. HR stuff .. I notice my Valentine’s Flowers soaking up the sun. I smile.
I head up to my closet.. squeeze into pants that did not fit last week. Smile
I see a text on my phone from our Quality Assurance phone at the office “teams, please enter through the side door.. we have a flood in our main entrance” I text back “sigh”…
NOW.. years ago .. I would have freaked out, now? carry on — make some phone calls and fix it. It was 50 degree’s yesterday .. that’s the issue. I smile.
I get to the office .. new faces. Not a single negative attitude in the room today from our field staff (or at least I can’t feel it.. it feels awesome). I smile.
We have 3 girls out sick today and we are booked solid WITH a snow day we are trying to fit it .. Julie is in uniform. She asked me last week if it was ok for her to work in the field . It was supposed to be to add in some deep cleans, now it is just to keep up. She’s helping me take care of our clients. I smile.
I head out the door to make the deposit … oil light and coolant light comes on in my car. I’m at the bank and the lights are NOT shutting off. Auto Zone is next door… drive over… I can’t get the oil cap off so I walk in to play my “girl card”
Seriously?? It’s a girl behind the counter.
Cough … “I hate to play my girl card… and now I REALLY feel silly playing the girl card but I can’t get the cap off” She looks at me like I am from mars… comes out and promptly makes me look silly by removing the cap. Then she gasps… there is gunk on my cap. Not so smart now are we chica?? She has to head in and ask a guy what’s wrong… (phew… saved) He comes out and asks me how far I drive everyday? I told him I live less than a mile from my office. He says “you need to head to Iowa City once a month and go shopping … that’s condensation” I smile. Um honey?? I must go shopping. DUH?? SMILE!
I call my husband back (I had alerted him to our potential issue) and let him know I have it handled. He’s rented a car for me for the next week and it’s going into the shop tomorrow. I smile.
As I am driving back to my office, I realize I really truly am smiling.
Why? Because at 45 .. I have finally REALLY began to live those faking it moments . You know the ones, where your life is in turmoil and you are frantic on the inside but smiling on the outside?
Don’t get me wrong.. I have plenty of freak out moments over things that are IN my control .. or someone else’s control .. and they are not living up to their potential… or I am not living up to mine. The small stuff? I don’t sweat it anymore, and what’s really cool? I’m realizing it’s all small… and for the most part, my smile reflects my inside!
The sun had a major effect on my attitude today. Feel the sun today .. and let it guide you tomorrow!
Sigh
Christmas and the holidays can bring major up and down emotions for all. I almost fell into the trap …
Christmas — we were missing 5 people.. due to illness and last minute work. I had a few moments where I was teary and mad at the world and THEN … I dragged myself back into the moment. Thank GOD I have the ability to cherish what I have.. can you imagine the moments I would have missed had I languished in what coulda woulda shoulda?? Life is precious, short and a journey. I LOVE the journey. Don’t get me wrong, I have my “woe is me” moments…
but my biggest gift to myself this Christmas was being grateful for the NOW
Coming to that awareness has been a journey for me — one that I still haven’t mastered but it’s on my 2014 list and probably will be on all future lists. I read. I read a lot! If I don’t have time to physically sit down with a book .. I will listen to a book. In my car, while I am getting dressed, cooking .. you name it! It started as an attempt to “find” myself .. now I know that you are always learning and evolving . I am always growing. The minute I think I don’t need it, don’t have time for it, know it all … is the minute I regress back to “woe is me” THAT will never happen. I can always learn something new – “teach me” I say!
If you were in my home before our kitchen remodel .. you know the extent that I take that! I had words on the walls .. READ, PRAY, LOVE, FORGIVE, HUG , FAMILY… I have dry erase markers near any mirror – random quotes that catch my eye will be written there. My husband and I don’t buy each other gifts at Christmas .. typically we will take a trip together instead (TIME is our most precious gift to each other) This year he said he just HAD to gift me some socks he saw while working in St.Louis. The toes.. I look down and see “I am awesome” .
I am awesome.
BE awesome — it’s a choice…..
OH my …
How did this year happen so quickly? Are you stressed? I will be honest… I WAS a wee bit stressed. My house… yes … even MY house can get DIRTY! I am one busy lady and this year is no exception. I have calmed down a bit on the demands I place on myself, cough … that’s what I am telling myself. Is it working? It truly is. I can let you in on a little secret… I decided to embrace the reason for the season.
It WORKS! Instead of stressing about not having all 26+ years of collected decor up the day AFTER Thanksgiving … I have incorporated it INTO the reason for the season.
HOW?
Each Sunday of Advent.. I add something NEW. This weekend we will finish the tree. Next weekend a wee bit more and by the time my boys arrive .. I will lovingly get their help to finish together as a family. Right boys? ahem
Let’s discuss the cleaning aspect…
Guess whose house does NOT get regular cleans when our client demand is HIGH … This girl. It’s OK.. sorta? NO WAY! I want to go to the theatre… make blankets for project linus, collect food for the food pantries, ring bells, sing carols, go to mass, BE with my family .. my time is worth so much more than cleaning the dang house!! I am taking whatever HOUR .. we have and thrilled with what they help me accomplish. I am lowering my expectations a little bit– taking off my “Martha” hat and putting on my “In the moment hat”. I am sleeping at night .. and enjoying this life.
The choice is yours.. what hat will you wear this season?
side note: In my quest for perfection, I have been very absent in the blog and newsletter forum of our business. I decided just to dive in. It won’t be perfect.. there will be grammatical errors BUT I love connecting with YOU again.